To get the best education possible for your child, form a synergistic team with your child’s teacher and any other service providers at their school. Just as both parents of a child need to be congruent in their parenting, all adults involved in a child’s education must be on the same page. Congruent does not mean identical. Team members don’t have to be exactly alike in their personality styles. The most effective results come from shared values and goals.
The key is to keep the focus of all communications between home and school on the best interests of your child. There will most likely be disagreement as to what “best interest” of your child means. That is where the open discussion and transparent communication comes in. You begin by being completely transparent with the school and expect them to be completely transparent with you. All parties must agree on this. Disagreements can be resolved when the focus is on the child. This means the adults cannot allow themselves to become distracted by ego, power games, revenge or old baggage. The past is done. Other cases don’t matter. We focus on what we can do to support this child’s academic success moving forward. When all members of the team can keep the focus on the child, miracles happen. Children reach milestones and achievements that may not have even been considered possible before.
Start at the beginning by keeping this goal of forming an effective team in mind as you meet with your children’s teachers for the first time. Most often, this is at some type of Back to School event. If you have chosen a really innovative school, they will have arranged for you to have one on one time with the teacher. This is ideal, but make the most of whatever you’re given. You could simply schedule another time to meet with your child’s teacher. Remember, you only have one chance to make a good first impression. Come to this meeting with all the positive energy you can muster.
Everyone likes to be appreciated. Include sincere compliments on the arrangement of the classroom, their appearance, background, willingness to be a teacher, things you’ve heard about them or the first impression they made. Teachers frequently spend hours preparing instructional materials without any recognition. Be generous with your appreciation. Express your anticipation of working with them to provide a successful school year for your child and the rest of the students in the classroom. Sincerely believe it will be a successful year and then work to make it so. That energy is contagious and soon everyone who works with your child will be infected with it.
Be prepared for this opportunity with written information you can give your child’s teacher. Make sure it includes your child’s name, your name and contact information. As you hand it over you are sincerely expressing your willingness to work with them and communicate frequently, because you are invested in your child’s academic success. Complete a contact form for a personalized handout with some general best practice resources for teachers based on your child’s special needs.
Don’t stop with the teacher. Make an effort to meet everyone who will be working with your child. Talk to the principal. Introduce yourself and explain that you have given your child’s teacher information about your child because you are excited to be working with them to help your child with special needs. Communicate your appreciation for all the service the principal provides and your willingness to support the school in any way you are able. Let them know you will be volunteering and are invested in the school’s success. If the school secretary is there, meet them as well. Introduce yourself to the custodian. Every person who works at the school will, at some point, interact with your child and has the potential of becoming the safe person your child can go to when they need additional support. Meet as many as you can, share your positive energy, and get a feel for their response.
Most likely you will find people who entered the field of education as a result of a desire to help children and make a difference. They will respond to your positive energy in kind and you will have initiated your effective team. Congratulations! You are ready for the next step, which is the subject of my next post.